This is why I've started backing away from any conversation involving the "tone argument." There's something really interesting to discuss there, but I'm wary of it being taken to mean, "I can say whatever I want to whoever I want with no accountability for my own rhetoric."

Yeah, it's a concept that lends itself to abuse very easily, and when it does get abused it's pretty much impossible to argue about the case because of the way the whole argument is framed.