Angelic Reflections
Jan. 4th, 2006 07:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
selenakOr, how Selena learned to love the (original) vampire with a soul. Which certainly didn’t happen on first sight. Or even on second. I liked Angel well enough during the first three seasons of BTVS, was as impressed as your next fan by the Angelus storyline (and DB’s sudden leap in performance skills) and found his romance with Buffy touching, but I also thought he had served his purpose by season 3. As I liked but did not love, and wasn’t too curious to learn more about him, I wasn’t sorry to see him go. I might not have started to watch the spin-off at all if not for Cordelia, who by season 3 of BTVS had become my favourite character (later, said favourite position went to Buffy herself, but that’s another essay).
However, City Of, the AtS pilot, started to change my mind about the big lug.
The moment we saw Angel jump into the car in heroic action series fashion, ready to give chase to the villain… and discovered he was in the wrong car, I felt a sudden wave of affection and thought I might stick with this show not just for Cordelia’s sake. Endearing moments like that started to pile up – take Angel’s reaction when Cordelia barges into his apartment and catches him in the shower. Or cuts his linoleum. And then there was the matter of fact way he offered Wesley, whom I had liked and pitied during season 3 of BTVS, a new home and acceptance in Parting Gifts. I liked his awkward not-romance with Kate; two lonely people with similar issues who developed a friendship. And what clinched it for me was Somnabulist, specifically Angel saying “they’re not nightmares – I enjoyed them”. One of the reasons why I had liked but not loved Angel on BTVS was the strict distinction the show seemed to draw between Angel souled and unsouled. Which made him less interesting to me. Somnabulist, however, made the point of Angel’s darker instinct being very much present in his souled incarnation and not as something alien to him, but something innate, something he had to fight. Which sealed the deal for me. I loved him. Maybe I loved Cordelia and Wesley just a tad more, but I did love him, with his hunger for a family and his inability to use a cell phone right, his bad dancing skills and his visceral, vicious anger that made him kick out one man out of the window and hack off the hand of another man. His dorkiness and his darkness.
Come season 2, I found one of my all time favourite characters in the Jossverse in the form of Darla, who hits one of my fannish kinks (smart, manipulative ruthless women). This mostly worked in Angel’s favour. I adored the story of Darla and Angel(us) unfolding via flashbacks and in the present day. Normally, I’m more interested in friendship and family relationships, but Darla/Angel was my one exception on AtS, from the moment on she pressed that cross against him and said “No matter how good a boy you are, God doesn’t want you. But I still do.” Right until and including Redefinition, I was the happiest fangirl ever. Not that I thought Angel locking up the lawyers with Dru and Darla or firing his friends in Reunion was a good thing (morally), but I thought it was brilliant, audacious storytelling.
Post-Redefinion, Darla disappeared for a while, and the story seemed to falter a bit, because despite the talk of taking the war to W&H, Angel never did anything worse than the money scheme in Blood Money. Sure, the Wesley, Cordy and Gunn bonding and establishing their own team was well done and touching, but they were an additional bonus, not why I tuned in each week. (Well. As soon as the tapes arrived from England, that is.) Then came Reprise and Epiphany… and my Darla and Angel loyalties were split. On the one hand, I knew I was supposed to be glad he returned to the fold (and as an employee, which was a good idea), and I loved his final conversation with Kate, especially as the resolution of Kate’s storyline. But. But.
For starters, I flinched for Darla getting the morning after asshole treatment as badly as I had done for Buffy in Innocence. Darla and Angel lashing out at each other, I had no problem with. That was part of their relationship. But get dressed and get out was just a one-sided suckerpunch (and drove me to commit fanfic, twice, on Darla’s feelings afterwards). More seriously, and leaving my Darla issues aside, I was puzzled, then irritated, by the fact that what Wesley and Cordelia seemed to be upset about was Angel firing them, not the lawyer buffet, and that the writers seemed to condone this by letting Lorne, at this point still Mr. Writerly Exposition, give his statement that left Angel of the hook for getting those people killed. (Okay, the fact the exchange with Lorne was coated with an anti-Darla remark didn’t help, either.)
LORNE: What's to understand? You think you're the first guy who ever rolled over, saw what was lying next to him and went 'Guyeah!' And you're not. Believe me. - It's called a moment of clarity, my lamb. And you've just had one. Sort of appalling, ain't it? To see just exactly where you've gotten yourself?
ANGEL: I don't know how to get back.
LORNE: Well, that's just the thing. You don't. You go on to the new place. Whatever that is.
ANGEL: I don't know if I can. - I-I've done - things. - Questionable things.
LORNE: Yes, you have. But-but you didn't kill those lawyers, Angel. That was slated to happen with or without you. The Powers were just trying to work it so it'd be without you, that's all.
Grrr, arrgh. Yes, I was upset, alright, with both the show and the character, and this led to a slow process of emotional disengagement that lasted a while. Now why I had no problem with Angel committing said acts to begin with but resented him while he was being back to working with the team, buying Cordy clothes and being dorky, I’m not a hundred percent sure, but thus it was. My major issue with the Pylea arc, which I suspect might be gone if I make myself rewatch it, knowing now how the show continues, was that I wanted some follow-up and consequences to Angel’s “beige” period, to the lawyer buffet, and I absolutely hated the thought that the “get dressed and get out” scene was the last thing we saw of Darla, or of Angel and Darla together. And instead, I got some kind of Ren Faire on crack.
Season 3 didn’t help me where Angel was concerned. It seemed to be Angel light through most of the season, and while I had previously adored his dorky side, now it seemed they were overusing it. Added to which was the overuse of kye-rumption and the sanctification of Cordelia. The only times the character I had been interested in and emotionally engaged with was around, safe in flashbacks, was during his scenes with Darla in her three episodes, especially in Lullaby, but then AtS seemed to have become a wacky sitcom for good.
As previously mentioned in another post, Loyalty and the ensuing Wesley arc changed this somewhat, and I was back to thinking “first class storytelling”. But I hadn’t yet reconnected to Angel himself.
(It was fascinating, watching those episodes again. Back then, emotionally invested only in Wesley as I had been, I had only been concerned about him and was “poor Wesley” all the way. Rewatching, with my Angel love firmly back in place and my Connor love right on a level with my Darla love, I was sorrier for them than I was for Wesley and despite some pity was more inclined to yell “Wesley, you idiot!” quite often.)
Watching him try to kill Wesley and then coolly torture Linwood was better than watching the earlier kye-rumption, but as opposed to his dark stint in season 2, this time I didn’t sympathize. All of which changed with the arrival of teenage Connor in A New World. I already rambled at length about Connor, so let me just repeat what this did to me in regards to Angel – watching his second scene with his grown sun, the desperate intensity of his love met with Connor’s equal desperate hatred, made me feel pity and love for Angel in a way I had not since the last scene of The Trial. Much like the relationship between Buffy and Dawn in season 5, the one between Angel and Connor became, to me, the heart of the show.
Connor brought out both Angel’s capacity for selflessness – see Home for ultimate proof – and selfishness (also Home, because I really don’t think changing the memories of his co-workers was part of W&H’s price for saving Connor; that was Angel not wanting to be confronted with their memories of him every day). For fury (not just over that three months stint in the ocean, but also Cordelia, and boy, both the “Daddy’s not finished talking” scene and Angel watching Connor and Cordy have sex just ooze visceral anger) and tenderness. That brief hug in Habeas Corpses and Angel’s pleading in the mall in Home break my heart every time. For being a dick – kicking out Connor the second time at the end of Habeas Corpses, and this time not over a wrong Connor committed – and for being a dork (when mindwiped! Connor compliments him on his demon-killing, Angel’s little “aw, that was nothing” spiel is adorable, as is his “do I look five hundred?” reaction later). That was a rich, three-dimensional character I could fall in love again, and this time, I remained fallen, till the end.
Looking back at season 5, I can think of many aspects I liked, and some I didn’t. Neither were always Angel-related. For example, season 5 offered the first Gunn storyline I really, truly adored throughout, whereas previously Gunn had been the character I was least interested in. But when it came down to it, the regular I was most concerned about wasn’t Wesley (odd thing about Wesley: I loved him in his earlier stages before he became fashionable, and never fell out of love but became slightly less enamoured when the rest of the fandom went “guh!” in season 4 and 5), it wasn’t Gunn, it wasn’t Fred and not Illyria (though she during her brief time became a firm favourite), and it wasn’t Spike. I could have done with Spike remaining dead after Chosen as far as Spike was concerned, but I really loved his scenes with Angel for what they brought out of Angel, petty bickering interlaced with deep understanding, and not so subtext. The character at the core of it all, to me? Was that guy who in the season 5 opener was unabashedly gleeful about his new cars, deeply embarrassed about the lawyers interrupting his heroic saving the girl gig, the guy who locked up Pavayne just as his son had once locked up him, the guy who didn’t quite know how to handle his formerly best friend given that said best friend didn’t remember his betrayal and their reconciliation. The guy who was spectacularly immature in Rome and burdened with the knowledge of centuries when he told his fellow undead “so were we, once”. The guy who in the end declared the dragon was for him. That guy. Angel.
However, City Of, the AtS pilot, started to change my mind about the big lug.
The moment we saw Angel jump into the car in heroic action series fashion, ready to give chase to the villain… and discovered he was in the wrong car, I felt a sudden wave of affection and thought I might stick with this show not just for Cordelia’s sake. Endearing moments like that started to pile up – take Angel’s reaction when Cordelia barges into his apartment and catches him in the shower. Or cuts his linoleum. And then there was the matter of fact way he offered Wesley, whom I had liked and pitied during season 3 of BTVS, a new home and acceptance in Parting Gifts. I liked his awkward not-romance with Kate; two lonely people with similar issues who developed a friendship. And what clinched it for me was Somnabulist, specifically Angel saying “they’re not nightmares – I enjoyed them”. One of the reasons why I had liked but not loved Angel on BTVS was the strict distinction the show seemed to draw between Angel souled and unsouled. Which made him less interesting to me. Somnabulist, however, made the point of Angel’s darker instinct being very much present in his souled incarnation and not as something alien to him, but something innate, something he had to fight. Which sealed the deal for me. I loved him. Maybe I loved Cordelia and Wesley just a tad more, but I did love him, with his hunger for a family and his inability to use a cell phone right, his bad dancing skills and his visceral, vicious anger that made him kick out one man out of the window and hack off the hand of another man. His dorkiness and his darkness.
Come season 2, I found one of my all time favourite characters in the Jossverse in the form of Darla, who hits one of my fannish kinks (smart, manipulative ruthless women). This mostly worked in Angel’s favour. I adored the story of Darla and Angel(us) unfolding via flashbacks and in the present day. Normally, I’m more interested in friendship and family relationships, but Darla/Angel was my one exception on AtS, from the moment on she pressed that cross against him and said “No matter how good a boy you are, God doesn’t want you. But I still do.” Right until and including Redefinition, I was the happiest fangirl ever. Not that I thought Angel locking up the lawyers with Dru and Darla or firing his friends in Reunion was a good thing (morally), but I thought it was brilliant, audacious storytelling.
Post-Redefinion, Darla disappeared for a while, and the story seemed to falter a bit, because despite the talk of taking the war to W&H, Angel never did anything worse than the money scheme in Blood Money. Sure, the Wesley, Cordy and Gunn bonding and establishing their own team was well done and touching, but they were an additional bonus, not why I tuned in each week. (Well. As soon as the tapes arrived from England, that is.) Then came Reprise and Epiphany… and my Darla and Angel loyalties were split. On the one hand, I knew I was supposed to be glad he returned to the fold (and as an employee, which was a good idea), and I loved his final conversation with Kate, especially as the resolution of Kate’s storyline. But. But.
For starters, I flinched for Darla getting the morning after asshole treatment as badly as I had done for Buffy in Innocence. Darla and Angel lashing out at each other, I had no problem with. That was part of their relationship. But get dressed and get out was just a one-sided suckerpunch (and drove me to commit fanfic, twice, on Darla’s feelings afterwards). More seriously, and leaving my Darla issues aside, I was puzzled, then irritated, by the fact that what Wesley and Cordelia seemed to be upset about was Angel firing them, not the lawyer buffet, and that the writers seemed to condone this by letting Lorne, at this point still Mr. Writerly Exposition, give his statement that left Angel of the hook for getting those people killed. (Okay, the fact the exchange with Lorne was coated with an anti-Darla remark didn’t help, either.)
LORNE: What's to understand? You think you're the first guy who ever rolled over, saw what was lying next to him and went 'Guyeah!' And you're not. Believe me. - It's called a moment of clarity, my lamb. And you've just had one. Sort of appalling, ain't it? To see just exactly where you've gotten yourself?
ANGEL: I don't know how to get back.
LORNE: Well, that's just the thing. You don't. You go on to the new place. Whatever that is.
ANGEL: I don't know if I can. - I-I've done - things. - Questionable things.
LORNE: Yes, you have. But-but you didn't kill those lawyers, Angel. That was slated to happen with or without you. The Powers were just trying to work it so it'd be without you, that's all.
Grrr, arrgh. Yes, I was upset, alright, with both the show and the character, and this led to a slow process of emotional disengagement that lasted a while. Now why I had no problem with Angel committing said acts to begin with but resented him while he was being back to working with the team, buying Cordy clothes and being dorky, I’m not a hundred percent sure, but thus it was. My major issue with the Pylea arc, which I suspect might be gone if I make myself rewatch it, knowing now how the show continues, was that I wanted some follow-up and consequences to Angel’s “beige” period, to the lawyer buffet, and I absolutely hated the thought that the “get dressed and get out” scene was the last thing we saw of Darla, or of Angel and Darla together. And instead, I got some kind of Ren Faire on crack.
Season 3 didn’t help me where Angel was concerned. It seemed to be Angel light through most of the season, and while I had previously adored his dorky side, now it seemed they were overusing it. Added to which was the overuse of kye-rumption and the sanctification of Cordelia. The only times the character I had been interested in and emotionally engaged with was around, safe in flashbacks, was during his scenes with Darla in her three episodes, especially in Lullaby, but then AtS seemed to have become a wacky sitcom for good.
As previously mentioned in another post, Loyalty and the ensuing Wesley arc changed this somewhat, and I was back to thinking “first class storytelling”. But I hadn’t yet reconnected to Angel himself.
(It was fascinating, watching those episodes again. Back then, emotionally invested only in Wesley as I had been, I had only been concerned about him and was “poor Wesley” all the way. Rewatching, with my Angel love firmly back in place and my Connor love right on a level with my Darla love, I was sorrier for them than I was for Wesley and despite some pity was more inclined to yell “Wesley, you idiot!” quite often.)
Watching him try to kill Wesley and then coolly torture Linwood was better than watching the earlier kye-rumption, but as opposed to his dark stint in season 2, this time I didn’t sympathize. All of which changed with the arrival of teenage Connor in A New World. I already rambled at length about Connor, so let me just repeat what this did to me in regards to Angel – watching his second scene with his grown sun, the desperate intensity of his love met with Connor’s equal desperate hatred, made me feel pity and love for Angel in a way I had not since the last scene of The Trial. Much like the relationship between Buffy and Dawn in season 5, the one between Angel and Connor became, to me, the heart of the show.
Connor brought out both Angel’s capacity for selflessness – see Home for ultimate proof – and selfishness (also Home, because I really don’t think changing the memories of his co-workers was part of W&H’s price for saving Connor; that was Angel not wanting to be confronted with their memories of him every day). For fury (not just over that three months stint in the ocean, but also Cordelia, and boy, both the “Daddy’s not finished talking” scene and Angel watching Connor and Cordy have sex just ooze visceral anger) and tenderness. That brief hug in Habeas Corpses and Angel’s pleading in the mall in Home break my heart every time. For being a dick – kicking out Connor the second time at the end of Habeas Corpses, and this time not over a wrong Connor committed – and for being a dork (when mindwiped! Connor compliments him on his demon-killing, Angel’s little “aw, that was nothing” spiel is adorable, as is his “do I look five hundred?” reaction later). That was a rich, three-dimensional character I could fall in love again, and this time, I remained fallen, till the end.
Looking back at season 5, I can think of many aspects I liked, and some I didn’t. Neither were always Angel-related. For example, season 5 offered the first Gunn storyline I really, truly adored throughout, whereas previously Gunn had been the character I was least interested in. But when it came down to it, the regular I was most concerned about wasn’t Wesley (odd thing about Wesley: I loved him in his earlier stages before he became fashionable, and never fell out of love but became slightly less enamoured when the rest of the fandom went “guh!” in season 4 and 5), it wasn’t Gunn, it wasn’t Fred and not Illyria (though she during her brief time became a firm favourite), and it wasn’t Spike. I could have done with Spike remaining dead after Chosen as far as Spike was concerned, but I really loved his scenes with Angel for what they brought out of Angel, petty bickering interlaced with deep understanding, and not so subtext. The character at the core of it all, to me? Was that guy who in the season 5 opener was unabashedly gleeful about his new cars, deeply embarrassed about the lawyers interrupting his heroic saving the girl gig, the guy who locked up Pavayne just as his son had once locked up him, the guy who didn’t quite know how to handle his formerly best friend given that said best friend didn’t remember his betrayal and their reconciliation. The guy who was spectacularly immature in Rome and burdened with the knowledge of centuries when he told his fellow undead “so were we, once”. The guy who in the end declared the dragon was for him. That guy. Angel.
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Re: PS
Date: 2006-01-04 08:09 pm (UTC)