Five things meme response the second
Feb. 27th, 2010 09:16 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
selenakFor ponygirl2000:
Or, thank you, Damon Lindelof, for making European history Ben's subject.
Five lessons plans from Benjamin Linus' class.
1.) Richard III: did he or didn’t he? Stage trial, appoint students as prosecutor and defense. Points if either quotes Talleyrand on “not a crime, worse, a stupidity”.
2.) Peace of Westphalia and the end of the 30-Years-War: where invading other countries actually became illegal and modern international relationships started. (Headmaster says not to overtax Republican students, as have rich donor parents more often than not. No need to worry. They’re bound to fall asleep after finding out Westphalia is not in Texas anyway.
3.) Introduction class to European history: yes, Virginia, it started before WWII and continued after. There even was something going on before the pilgrims left. Rinse, repeat. Why am I doing this to myself each year?
4.) “History repeats itself, first as tragedy, once as farce.” Discuss, with illustrating examples. (Students who correctly identify this as a Karl Marx quote get bonus points.)
5.) Cromwell: could he have prevented the Restoration after his death? If so, how? Discuss consequences of English Republic in midst of European monarchies for the next centuries. Note: figuring out your teacher adds to his income by writing Alternate Histories under a pseudonym might qualify you as a successful toady, but doesn’t get you better grades on your term paper. On the other hand, coming up with a plausible treatment for a new novel alternate history scenario just might.
Forlikeadeuce:
5 things Mark Antony (Rome version) decided not to say in Caesar's funeral oration.
1.) “He was a man, take him for all in all, I shall not look upon his like again." Antony decided this would make him sound like some graduate from Rhodos with emotional problems.
2.) “He’s in Romulus’ bosom, if ever a man was.” This had been a rather good line he heard in a tavern, but you needed to be a) female and b) over 60 to pull it off, so Antony skipped it.
3.) “That’s but a trifle here,” about the fact Antony himself nearly got killed. He knew what he was good at, and false modesty wasn’t it.
4.) “Caesar’s trust, like a good parent, did beget of him a falsehood in its contrary as great as that trust was.” The whole parent metaphor was dicey, bearing in mind no one is quite sure when Caesar’s liason with Servilia started, and besides, this phrase would have made Antony sound like a lecturing bore. He needed to provide a contrast to Brutus, not a similarity.
5.) Anything involving the words “farewell”. Not simply because he didn’t want the mob being done with Caesar, but because he himself wasn’t done. He was furious. Because annoying little Octavian was the heir instead of Antony himself, because bloody Marcus Junius Brutus should have been banished or executed after Pharsalus, and because Caesar shouldn’t have died. Not yet. Not ever.
Forcmattq:
Or, four crossovers and a cheap pun.
Five parallel universes Dawn Summers never visited
1.) When the man in the pin-stripped suit looked at her, she could tell that he saw what Glory and the mad people did. “You know I’m the key, don’t you?” Dawn asked warily. “That’s one word for what you are,” he said sadly. “A key to unlock space and time. Time and relative dimensions in space. TARDIS.”
As soon as he said it, the memories came back, the memories of millennia, before the monks, using her chameleon circuit and the raw energy of the vortex that she channeled to reshape reality around her, had given her this shape. She tried to hold on to what was Dawn, but she couldn’t, not in his vicinity; the chameleon circuit readjusted itself at long last, and she felt her old being grow around him.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m so sorry.”
2.) For all the times Anya had gone on about a world without shrimp, Dawn had never expected it to actually exist. She wondered whether pizza was even more popular here. Then she actually saw shrimps sold on a fish market and cried “that’s cheating”. It took her a while to figure out that what this universe was without was SHRIMP, aka Sensitive High Resolution Ion Microprobes, produced in Cranberra, at least in Dawn’s world. It wasn’t that different from her universe, except that the unemployment rate in Australia was even higher.
3.) Maybe the stubbly guy thought “come with me if you want to live” was the best chat up line ever. Dawn just glared. “Look,” she said. “My sister is the Slayer. And I got past the whole needing to be saved on Tuesdays gig when I was fifteen. So how about just telling me what’s going on?”
4.) You’d think being on a living ship full of aliens would mean an end for all those pesky comparisons with Buffy, real or implied, but no, that John Crichton fellow went on and on about how much he was into her. And then he topped it by declaring Dawn shouldn’t exist and the fact she did proved that in his absence someone had jumped the shark. Clearly, Dawn should have made a different wish in front of Halfrek. One that didn’t involve leaving home, ever.
5.) The Buffybot was recharging for the night, and Dawn cuddled down beside it, aware that Willow and Tara would probably freak out if they knew she did this, when it happened: a blonde in a red dress and some English-accented guy with shoulder-long dark hair showing up out of nowhere. They looked at the bot, and then at Dawn. “All of this has happened before,” said the blonde. “And it will happen again,” said the Brit. “How do you feel leading the fight for equal rights for artificial life forms, Ms. Summers? You might say it’s God’s will.”
ponygirl2000:Or, thank you, Damon Lindelof, for making European history Ben's subject.
Five lessons plans from Benjamin Linus' class.
1.) Richard III: did he or didn’t he? Stage trial, appoint students as prosecutor and defense. Points if either quotes Talleyrand on “not a crime, worse, a stupidity”.
2.) Peace of Westphalia and the end of the 30-Years-War: where invading other countries actually became illegal and modern international relationships started. (Headmaster says not to overtax Republican students, as have rich donor parents more often than not. No need to worry. They’re bound to fall asleep after finding out Westphalia is not in Texas anyway.
3.) Introduction class to European history: yes, Virginia, it started before WWII and continued after. There even was something going on before the pilgrims left. Rinse, repeat. Why am I doing this to myself each year?
4.) “History repeats itself, first as tragedy, once as farce.” Discuss, with illustrating examples. (Students who correctly identify this as a Karl Marx quote get bonus points.)
5.) Cromwell: could he have prevented the Restoration after his death? If so, how? Discuss consequences of English Republic in midst of European monarchies for the next centuries. Note: figuring out your teacher adds to his income by writing Alternate Histories under a pseudonym might qualify you as a successful toady, but doesn’t get you better grades on your term paper. On the other hand, coming up with a plausible
For
likeadeuce: 5 things Mark Antony (Rome version) decided not to say in Caesar's funeral oration.
1.) “He was a man, take him for all in all, I shall not look upon his like again." Antony decided this would make him sound like some graduate from Rhodos with emotional problems.
2.) “He’s in Romulus’ bosom, if ever a man was.” This had been a rather good line he heard in a tavern, but you needed to be a) female and b) over 60 to pull it off, so Antony skipped it.
3.) “That’s but a trifle here,” about the fact Antony himself nearly got killed. He knew what he was good at, and false modesty wasn’t it.
4.) “Caesar’s trust, like a good parent, did beget of him a falsehood in its contrary as great as that trust was.” The whole parent metaphor was dicey, bearing in mind no one is quite sure when Caesar’s liason with Servilia started, and besides, this phrase would have made Antony sound like a lecturing bore. He needed to provide a contrast to Brutus, not a similarity.
5.) Anything involving the words “farewell”. Not simply because he didn’t want the mob being done with Caesar, but because he himself wasn’t done. He was furious. Because annoying little Octavian was the heir instead of Antony himself, because bloody Marcus Junius Brutus should have been banished or executed after Pharsalus, and because Caesar shouldn’t have died. Not yet. Not ever.
For
cmattq:Or, four crossovers and a cheap pun.
Five parallel universes Dawn Summers never visited
1.) When the man in the pin-stripped suit looked at her, she could tell that he saw what Glory and the mad people did. “You know I’m the key, don’t you?” Dawn asked warily. “That’s one word for what you are,” he said sadly. “A key to unlock space and time. Time and relative dimensions in space. TARDIS.”
As soon as he said it, the memories came back, the memories of millennia, before the monks, using her chameleon circuit and the raw energy of the vortex that she channeled to reshape reality around her, had given her this shape. She tried to hold on to what was Dawn, but she couldn’t, not in his vicinity; the chameleon circuit readjusted itself at long last, and she felt her old being grow around him.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m so sorry.”
2.) For all the times Anya had gone on about a world without shrimp, Dawn had never expected it to actually exist. She wondered whether pizza was even more popular here. Then she actually saw shrimps sold on a fish market and cried “that’s cheating”. It took her a while to figure out that what this universe was without was SHRIMP, aka Sensitive High Resolution Ion Microprobes, produced in Cranberra, at least in Dawn’s world. It wasn’t that different from her universe, except that the unemployment rate in Australia was even higher.
3.) Maybe the stubbly guy thought “come with me if you want to live” was the best chat up line ever. Dawn just glared. “Look,” she said. “My sister is the Slayer. And I got past the whole needing to be saved on Tuesdays gig when I was fifteen. So how about just telling me what’s going on?”
4.) You’d think being on a living ship full of aliens would mean an end for all those pesky comparisons with Buffy, real or implied, but no, that John Crichton fellow went on and on about how much he was into her. And then he topped it by declaring Dawn shouldn’t exist and the fact she did proved that in his absence someone had jumped the shark. Clearly, Dawn should have made a different wish in front of Halfrek. One that didn’t involve leaving home, ever.
5.) The Buffybot was recharging for the night, and Dawn cuddled down beside it, aware that Willow and Tara would probably freak out if they knew she did this, when it happened: a blonde in a red dress and some English-accented guy with shoulder-long dark hair showing up out of nowhere. They looked at the bot, and then at Dawn. “All of this has happened before,” said the blonde. “And it will happen again,” said the Brit. “How do you feel leading the fight for equal rights for artificial life forms, Ms. Summers? You might say it’s God’s will.”
